Written by queen mudder
Print this
Topics: Lord Lucan

Thursday, 9 August 2007

image for New Lord Lucan sighting in Charles's back passage
"Just you DARE get a search warrant for my back passage you swine!"

Clarence House - (Rectum Press): A new sighting of Lord Lucan has been reported in Prince Charles's back passage - the last known confirmed sighting of the missing peer who vanished after losing the Hellfire Club's entire House of Mountbatten blind trust investment portfolio in a game of crapps at the Ritz Casino thirty three years ago.

Lucan and the Pretender to the Puppet Throne were always at it 'hammer and tongs' according to Buckingham Palace sources who originally hired the Irish peer as a companion for Charles during his days as a Royal Navy semen (sic).

Lucan disappeared in 1974 after the murder of his children's nanny who had been all set to testify against her employer shagging Charles and the entire battalion of the Household Cavalry before the money was squandered.

Plenty of daftass conspiracy stories about his disappearance have helped the Puppet Monarch continue the fantasy that he's still alive and living in obscurity somewhere in the murkiest depths of the Commonwealth.

"But as everybody in the know secretly knows," a very reliable Ministry of Defence sources said today, "Lucan is buried just around the corner from Buck House where the royalhorses daily drop their excrement after exercising in Hyde Park's Rotten Row nearby."

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Related Stories...


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 multiplied by 2?

4 21 6 25
62 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more