Written by Kent Pete
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Topics: The Spoof, Death

Sunday, 5 August 2007

image for Read this, or die!
Death playing golf yesterday.

Madcap journalist Peter Musgrove put his career on the line today by writing possibly the most controversial headline in the history of the online magazine, The Spoof.

Speaking from a secret location in France our gynecomastia suffering reporter said last night,

"I was emailed by my editor Midge Florrell, who told me that due to a recent drop in cyber hits our publication had to come up with a jaw dropping piece of news that would quite literally force surfers to download our site."

Sporting a rather tasteful Bloomingdale's bra our correspondent continued, "I had worked for the newspaper/jazz mag "The Sport" before and therefore knew the importance of a dramatic title. It was me infact that came up with the headline, 'Aliens abduct Rooney as he prays on women in Manchester Care home' and the now classic, 'I took Beckham up the Mersey Canal claims gay lover', so I knew what I was doing."

However a statement from newspaper watchdog, the PPC claimed that this time the double D'ed writer had gone too far, "To claim that if you don't read a specific article you will die just goes beyond the bounds of public decency.

"We all know Mr Musgrove has gypsy blood which confuses the issue because it's obvious what these gypo's can do with their curses and all, but I would advice everybody to stay clear of the article as it sends out the wrong message to unscrupulous advertiser's who would go to any lengths to promote their product. What next, 'Shop at Asda or contract an unsightly STD'?!"

When questioned about whether or not he had played safe by reading Musgrove's article the spokesman from Watchdog hung up his phone.

So it is now left to the discretion of the reader, to take a chance on a visit from the grim reaper or download the article. For all of you that have got this far, congratulations, you live to tell the tale.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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