Written by KendoMonkey
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Tuesday, 5 June 2001

William Hague, leader of the UK Conservative party, has been forced to re-sign a personal document after he was caught in a landslide and his writing went wobbly.

The landslide happened whilst holidaying in Switzerland with his wife Ffion. The cabin in which the two were staying was said to have "shook a fair bit".

The document was said to have been of some importance, and there is widespread suggestion that it was a personal letter to Michael Portillo telling him to "get off my porch, you varmint" (but obviously in less gun-slinging terms.)

Michael Portillo has yet to respond to these suggestions, but Ann Widdecombe has said:

"Well, no matter what I say, I annoy people. So I'm going to keep quiet."

Unfortunately we had to move away before she said anything more.

William Hague is said to be recovering from the incident in which he was said to have signed the document "Wilia__/|`'__" and will be back to face the press on Friday.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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