Written by Taffeta Windbag

Print this
Topics: Obesity, Transport

Friday, 27 July 2007

image for Fat commuters banned from underground
No room on top

In a radical move, London Underground have announced they will ban chubby commuters from boarding their trains.

After months of detailed research into tube overcrowding, it was concluded that trains are full not because of poor service or unreliable rolling stock but because the majority of the passengers are 'tubby wasters who should be walking instead'.

Highlighting links between the rise in national obesity and overcrowding on public transport, a representative from management consultants DeLoight, said that their months of investigation clearly revealed that fat travellers are 'like large dollops of cholesterol clogging up London's transport artery'. He continued, 'rather than invest more money into extra carriages, we have advised London Underground to fit their station entrances with new turnstiles to weed out anyone over 10 stone'.

John Prescott refused to comment.

Make Taffeta Windbag's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 1 multiplied by 4?

2 4 9 5

Go to top