Prince Charles today shocked the British public by endorsing a U.S. Presidential candidate and pledging several lesser known pieces of the Royal Crown Jewels to be auctioned as a fundraiser for American Ron Paul.
Among the items to be auctioned are several historical erotica pieces,including a jewel encrusted chastity belt, a ruby tipped, gold penis extension, and a ten foot, bull whip with a diamond encrusted handle once used by Princess Di.
When asked why he was so keen to support Mr. Paul the Prince had this to say, "He's got something that no other candidate's got, he has testicles. Now I don't mean physically he has testicles because I understand he's somewhat physically challenged in that area, but for a man with just one ball, he has more charisma than Arnold Swarzenegger."
"The American people need to wake up!" continued Charles, "If this man were English, I have no doubt he could be Prime Minister, or at the very least King. In fact many of his views are Kingly in nature and his followers are devoted like royal subjects ought to be.
Americans could do a lot worse than to allow Mr. Paul to take them back to the dark ages...er the good 'ol days."
The Royal Jewels may be found on Ebay, the auction will end tomorrow, with the items going to the highest bidder.