West Virginia Beach - (Ass Mess) The Reverend Pat Robertson has cancelled a visit to the UK and blamed the summer floods there on abortions, gay marriage, cannabis downgrading and godless inter-racial breeding run riot.
"The Lord has told me to stay away from the land of the heathen," Robertson said on his show this week.
"These floods are the Almighty's judgment on the immorality and greed of the Brits.
"They have provoked God to act by sending storms and making thousands of people homeless.
"The wrath of the Lord wreaked havoc by way of Hurrican Katrina and Brits should learn from that before it's too late."
Robertson also said that while some who have been affected by the storms are innocent victims, "others just brought it upon themselves through fornication and drinking, drugs and acts of buggery."
Meanwhile Brits are heaving a sigh of relief that the hoary old superstition peddler has decided not to come to the UK and left them to their traditional pleasure pursuits sanctioned by the ever-benevolent Archbishop of Canterbury.