People who shop after 11pm at 24 hour supermarkets are more than likely a gay. A recent study, conducted at the 24 hour Asda in Great Bridge found that 60% of all shoppers in store were either bi-curious or full blown homosexual.
When asked, a young man in tight denim shorts and pink T-shirt, wearing Jean Paul Gaultier aftershave from around 1999 said "I didn't realise how many of us gays instinctively shop after 11pm."
Gary Harris, a spokesman for Asda said "It would appear that the attraction of shopping for your copy of Gay Times and Glade plug-in room fresheners after hours is a real draw for the gay community." He added "I sincerely believe that there is no sinister reason for this market trend, and that the influx of camp men at this hour is purely coincidental."
The study confirmed that between 11pm and 3am, 60% of shoppers loved mutual cock or fanny play, 20% were stoned and the remaining 20% was a mix of drunks, bag ladies and miscreants.