Written by carina-eta
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Topics: Money, Divorce

Friday, 22 June 2007

image for 64% of Marriages End In Divorce Due to Lack of Money
Forget Superman-only sixpences can save us now.

With the recent rise in divorce rates showing no sign of slowing down, Government think tanks have long expounded their reasons why Great Britain's divorce rate is soaring.

From a breakdown in family life due to a lack of faith to the disturbing trend of young single mothers, otherwise known as "witches" to be hunted down and deprived of benefits.

However, a new Government Department headed by Prime Minister in waiting Gordon Brown thinks it has found the definitive answer. After extensive research involving Universities and case studies the length and breadth of the U.K, The University of Oxford has today released a paper highlighting the cause and ultimately, the solution to Britains lone-parent families.

Brown commented,"We went back a couple of centuries. While the socio-economic ratio wasn't much different, we found one glaring and obvious difference."

Apparantly, the popular wedding rhyme," Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue." has another sentence which has been lost over the years in the mists of time.

Professors are confident that the rhyme acts as a sort of spell and while modern brides are still strictly adherring to the old, new, borrowed and blue part of the spell, they need the final sentence to ensure a happy, divorce-free union.

The final line has been identified as,"and a lucky sixpence for your shoe."

Brown has pledged that as soon as he steps into Downing Street sixpences will be reminted and brides up and down the country will have access to both the rhyme and the sixpence. "I am confident that within 10 years of this new measure Britain will once again be a united happily married well adjusted Country." said Brown today.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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