Written by Clark Kunt
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Tuesday, 4 November 2008

image for Women just aren't right for men
"It was staring me in the face all along, this is what I should have been looking for!" says Herbert

One man's journey with the opposite sex finally arrived at a fresh new destination, of course, we are talking with reference to one particular gentleman we interviewed not more than 4 minutes and 32 seconds ago - Herbert Humphrey Humbledick.

'Herb' was an average guy, not too dissimilar to anyone else, some might even say he's learnt the hard way, some might say he's just plain stupid, some even might say he's got his pants on back to front, who knows, Herbert tells us his emotional story here -

"When I was 14 and a half, I hoped that one day I would have a real girlfriend. When I was 16 I got one, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with a buzz for life."

"In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was far too emotional. Everything was like an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide, even pissed herself once. So I decided I needed a girl with some stability.

"When I was 25 and a quarter I found a very stable girl but she was dull. She was predictable and never got excited about anything."

Life became so boring that Herb decided he needed a girl with some excitement.

"When I was 28 I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her; she rushed from one thing to another, never settling on or finishing anything. She did mad impetuous things and made me sad as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some ambition.

"When I turned 30, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground and married her.

"She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned."

Herbert, older and wiser than at the start of the interview, is now looking for a girl with big tits.

Any interested readers should mark their post with their cup size.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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