Written by Titus A Dux
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Topics: Tony Blair, Treasury

Sunday, 8 February 2004

image for Blair Announces Public Enquiry
Blair "Unaware" Yesterday

Tony Blair today announced to launch a public enquiry into governmental spending waste on public enquiries. He said in an interview: "It was important to evaluate the overall impact on the treasury of having so many public enquiries". He also launched a Public enquiry into the public enquiry to find out whether a public enquiry was necessary on the fact that he calls for so many public enquiries.

As a spokesman for Dulux claimed that they had fulfilled an order for 200 gallons of whitewash to be delivered to number 10 another spokesman for Downing street dismissed the claims that it was a poor use of public money and claimed that Leo's bedroom needed decorating.

Gordon Brown, as usual was unavailable for comment on something that may harm his chances of becoming the next Prime minister but a source close to him did say that the whitewash was purchased with at a special discounted rate and would not cost the tax payer as much as it would from B&Q, although if it became a subject on the lunchtime Jeremy Vine show on Radio 2 then there would be a public enquiry.

The spoof can exclusively reveal that the whitewash was purchased through a dodgy middleman, now living in Alice Springs known only to Cherie Blair and that the Prime Minister has never heard of him. In fact the prime minister said he'd not understood at the time that the whitewash had been ordered and was available for delivery within 45 minutes from a local depot, he thought it could me made available anywhere in the world within 45 minutes.

A public enquiry will be held to find out the why the Prime Minister deflects difficult questions through the long drawn out process of a public enquiry.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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