Channel 4 have confirmed that they will be showing photographs of Princess Diana's death, but that is of little interest to her sons, Their Royal Highnesses William and Harry.
An insider at madasasalmon, the Royal boys' chosen internet service provider (ISP), has revealed that their internet connection has been used to download "over 1,000 images of (predominantly) shemales" in "the last 7 days".
The ISP has a copy of every image in its cache, and is apparently planning on selling the evidence to the newspapers, who, of course, would be unable to show them in their entirety due to their explicit nature.
"They seem to like guys with large boobs and large manhoods" the insider continued.
A spokesman for William and Harry says they are "highly distressed" by the claims, and re-iterated that "the claims are 100% untrue."