Written by matthatt
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Wednesday, 16 May 2007

image for Light Sabres to be issued to non-Jedi Police, Jedi Council in uproar!
DO NOT TRY AND COMB YOUR HAIR WITH A LIGHT SABRE!

London, ASS - Press: - More police officers are to be armed with Light Sabres under plans revealed by the Home Secretary.

John Reid will announce that use of the controversial weapons will no longer be limited to trained Jedi officers, if independent medical advice backs the proposal.
Crucially, the circumstances in which suspects can be Light Sabred will also be widened.

A Home Office spokeswoman said: "The Home Secretary is expected to announce the intention, subject to independent medical advice, to commence a trial to extend the use of Light Sabres to specially-trained teams although not necessarily Jedi's.

The Jedi Council have hit back in a calm authoritative tone by saying "this is tantamount to giving Light Sabres to Darth Vader's Storm Troopers!"

Mr Reid is due to announce the move during his speech to the Police Federation annual conference on Coruscant.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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