Police in Reading Berkshire have found a bag in a trendy shopping centre and have announced that they are completely baffled by the find.
Chief Superintendent, Bill Briggs, told us:
"We acted on a tip-off from a member of the public who phoned our incident room and reported that there was a bag.
We mobilised our bag team and went to the scene in a matter of minutes. After a lengthy stand-off we picked the bag up and put it in a nearby rubbish bin"
There has been a spate of bags being found all over the UK and in some cases they have had some stuff in them. The Spoof can exclusively reveal that a bag found recently in London had a half-eaten cheese and pickle sandwich and an empty Pepsi can.
Leading criminologist, Percy Postman, comments.
"Nothing is new under the sun and quite honestly there was a similar outbreak of this kind of thing in 1964"
But we'll leave the last word to cheeky cock en ee TV funny man, Bradley Walsh, who when he heard about the bags said:
"It just goes to show, don't it?" But we'll let his bad grammar pass.