Written by Catylik
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Topics: Eggs, Humpty Dumpty

Tuesday, 24 April 2007

image for Egg in benefit fraud scandal
The egg lived a life of luxury.

Representatives of the King's horses & his men today confirmed that an egg that they had reassembled in a pioneering piece of medical history, has been claiming incapacity benefits, despite being able bodied.

The egg was speedily 'Put together again' after an amazing feat by His Majesty's Emergency Services. The incident happened after the egg, who is known to his friends as Humpty Dumpty, fell off the wall - an event that made national news at the time. However, after the egg was finally declared well again by medical authorities, he failed to alert social services. This meant that his incapacity benefits, which he was claiming during the time of his ailment, were still being paid to him. These payments have continued until yesterday morning, when they were stopped after the home office received a tip-off from a local farmer.

It has been reported that the egg owes over £30,000 to the Government, which the Press Association said was "not a patch on his overall wealth".

In a press conference, the egg said "I have no recollection of receiving any sort of benefits - the Doctors must have begun the process without my knowledge." He continued, "I apologise to the Government, and will happily refund any money owed."

The home office refused to comment on this case, but said they will in due course, once a thorough (and no doubt expensive) investigation has been conducted.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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