Written by Duff
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Topics: School, Kids, Fat, Fat Camp

Thursday, 19 April 2007

image for New Incentive For Obese Maths Students
Porto portas portat. I love my pies and that's that.

In a desperate attempt to get modern porky kids interested in mathematics, schools throughout the UK are trying to make the boring crusty subject more relevant.

And it's starting with Algebra. There's hardly a schoolboy or gal who doesn't know the old theorem "the rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain" Well The Spoof can sensationally reveal that henceforth the pie symbol (π), bane of so many scholars, will be replaced by a real pie!

Now the value of pie r2 will depend on the filling of the pie. If it's chicken and mushroom then it will be 12.998876666666r but if it's mince beef and onion then the answer will always be 5. Steak and ale will be the exception that proves the rule.

An eminent mathematician told us:

"Although I'm undoubtedly a fat bastard, I most certainly did not eat all the pies.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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