Written by Cal Jennings
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Monday, 16 April 2007

image for Tawad and Jihad Brigades Linked to the Bush Administration
We've gotta' protekt Ameraca frum those dangerus Iraqi terrerits.

(CMM) - The BBC said Sunday it is "deeply concerned" about an unknown militant group's claim that it has killed a BBC reporter who had been kidnapped last month in Gaza.

In a statement faxed to news agencies Sunday, the Tawad and Jihad Brigades promised to "distribute a video showing his killing to media channels soon."

Palestinian officials said they have no evidence or information that reporter Alan Johnston, who was apparently abducted at gunpoint on March 12, was killed.

Upon investigating the evidence, the Palestinian officials uncovered a link to the Bush administration. They reportedly became suspicious after finding that the person who supplied the information was the same person who supplied the Bush administration with documents about "weapons of mass destruction."

When President Bush was asked to comment, he replied, "I still say there are wepuns of mass destrucshun in Iraq, and we're gonna' find 'em if we have to put 'em there ourselfs. We've gotta stop these terrerist and their nucular wepons before they attack the US again."

When the reporter pointed out that it was Afghanistan who was responsible for 9/11, not Iraq, Bush replied, "There ya' go agin. Citing the liberal media's use of such insignif... insifigan... insific... unimportant things as facts and scientific data to cloud the issues. We've gotta' protekt Ameraca frum those dangerus Iraqi terrerits."

The reporter interviewing Bush was rushed to the hospital shortly thereafter when he passed out from laughing so hard that he could not catch his breath.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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