Iran has continued to deny that the sailors and marines it apprehended from a British vessel were ever hostages, as alleged by US President George Bush over the weekend, insisting that all fifteen were part of a reality television show called Big Allah, where foreign contestants share a house for several weeks with Iranian militiamen. The show had first aired back in 1979, when it had lasted over a year, and the idea for the new show came from Prime Minister Imadinnerjacket, who had been one of the presenters of the original show.
Meanwhile, UK television company the BBC has announced a new TV quiz game called Fifteen To None, to be hosted by evil Welsh-hating ginger witch Anne Robinson. In the original Fifteen To One, contestants answer questions then vote one of their number off the programme. In the new version, contestants will be accused of a number of crimes and those that admit the crimes will be allowed to leave the television studio in a helicopter with some new clothes. Producers have received record numbers of applications from members of the Royal Navy, who are apparently willing to admit to absolutely anything if it means getting on television.
ITV has announced a rival game show called In Your Waters, where presenters invade someone's house, snatch all the occupants, put them in front of television cameras and accuse them of a variety of crimes. Those that deny the accusations win extended holidays to Middle Eastern countries where they will get to meet and shake hands with leading politicians.