Written by Sprat
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Topics: England

Tuesday, 3 April 2007

image for Shropshire Declares Independence
Leader of the MIA

In a dramatic revolution yesterday the English county of Shropshire declared independence from the rest of the United Kingdom. Shropshire, sandwiched between the Midlands and Wales, is known as a traditional county with no public aspirations of independence however the revolutionary group known as the 'Middle England Alliance' (MIA) have swept the board in the secretive referendum held in Shrewsbury town hall, with a 89% 'yes to independence' vote.

The vote took place with over 200 local clergymen, business owners and pre-school children taking part. Landlocked Shropshire has little natural resources and no access to the sea but local vicar Rev. Jimmy Dodger, 89, said "the River Severn is an excellent resource waiting to be tapped, our people can survive on bottled water, native swordfish and eggs, our people will be the healthiest in Europe". Local nursery child Simmy Javille, 4, said "this toffee is sticky" before running from our reporter.

Shropshire is awaiting acceptance of sovereignty in the United Nations Security Council, which is thought to be given in the next 6-8 years. The main concern in the surrounding areas is the predicted pillaging of Dudley expected in the next 20 years as swordfish supplies run out. There will be a meeting at Shrewsbury Town Hall at 8.30 (local time) to discuss the new flag, national dresss, conscription to the military and territorial ambitions.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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