Written by aningeniousname
Print this

Friday, 2 March 2007

image for Scots Porridge Mine Disaster
Inside Scotland's Glenalkie porridge mine.

Perthshire- It was just after 3.00pm yesterday afternoon, in the small Scottish mining town of Glenalkie, that news first started to filter out of the local porridge works that there had been a massive cave in 2500ft beneath the the main pit head of Scotlands largest working porridge mine.

The cave in was believed to have started, Thursday just after 2.00pm , when bekilted miners dynamited a huge untapped porridge seam which then quickly transformed itself into the thing all porridge miners fear; a porridge slip.
Early reports suggest that as many as fifty local men remain trapped underground; neck deep in what the proud locals of Glenalkie call "White gold"

The Glenalkie porridge mines have been the main source of income for the families of the town ever since the huge deposits of untapped oats were first discovered in the late nineteeth century.
Local people are well aware of the dangers of deep earth porridge mining; but as one resident told me "Aye laddie this is a porridge town and a porridge town it'll stay."

So far all rescue efforts have been hampered by the fear of vibrations from the diggers causing a second and surely fatal porridge slip. All attempts at contacting the stricken miners have failed and some around the town are now fearing the worst; unless the men can somehow manage to eat themselves to the surface.

Make aningeniousname's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 1 multiplied by 1?

8 11 1 2
49 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience on our website, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more