Written by Brancastrian
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 23 February 2007

image for Basil Brush Caught Shoplifting!
When Good Foxes Go Bad!

Sensational news was announced today when it was revealed that long time childrens' TV favourite, Basil Brush, had been arrested for shoplifting in a London department store.

Brush, aged 48, had been on a shopping trip to Regents Street and had been noted acting "suspiciously" by a store detective in the Hamley's toy shop. It is thought that Mr Brush, a single Fox, who lives in Putney, had initially gone into the store to buy a Paddington Bear toy for his long term friend, Mr Roy, when he was distracted by a display of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. At this point, Brush was seen by two separate witnesses to place one of the toys into his waistcoat pocket before trying to leave the store.

A minor scuffle ensured during which Mr Brush allegedly caused chaos in the stuffed toy department, scattering toy chickens and assorted animals everywhere. Eventually however, assisted by two policemen; a couple of fox hounds,and two thunderflashes, which did the trick by temporarily stunning the recalcitrant fox by going "Boom! Boom!". Mr Brush, dazed and rather emotional, gave himself up and was escorted out of the shop. said, in a statement to supporters and friends, including Dirty Gertie from Number 30, after the incident "...a ha ha ha ha HA-HA-HA-HA--HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAA...." His case will be held before Putney magistrates on Tuesday morning.

Mr Brushes dog, Little Ticker, has been taken into care by the RSPCA.

Naturally, many readers will wonder who the hell Mr Roy, Dirty Gertie from Number 30 and Little Ticker are- if you are in doubt, please ask your Mum or Dad, especially if they are in their 40's.

Brush currently has a contract with Children's BBC. It is thought that this will now be reviewed with the possibility that he may be suspended. There is a precedent here, it was only three years ago that former BBC star, Edd the Duck, once a Saturday morning idol was discovered drinking strong cider outside the BBC TV Centre on the morning the PM was due to visit. Duck, 26, is now in rehab at the RSPB Centre in Sandy, Beds.

Brushes good friend Gordon the Gopher has visited the fox in his cell, he gave a brief statement to reporters afterwards as follows; "...eeep eep squeak eeep meep meep, MEEP eep..."

Hamleys were unavailable for comment.

Make Brancastrian's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 5 plus 1?

3 1 12 6

Go to top