Written by Duff
Rating:
Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 23 February 2007

image for New Strain Of Super Bed-bugs Out Of Control And Pumped Up On Crisps
A new strain of super bed-bug out of control and pumped up on crisps yesterday

A new strain of super bed-bug has started appearing in homes up and down the country and the message is "be afraid be very afraid"

A spokesman for a leading bedding store tells us:

"The first place these started to turn up was the poorer inner-city council estates where standards of hygiene and cleanliness are pretty poor.

These super-bugs thrive on crisps and of course the lower orders are always eating food in bed, and as they always buy shite for their kids and that, then it's no surprise that this plague is getting totally out of hand"

Doreen Slag of an inner-city estate told us:

"I was in bed with my hubby eating some crisps and dropped one. Then I let a crisp fall from my hand too. I reached down to pick it up and next thing I had one of these super bed-bugs attached to my finger. It was 'orrible I can tell you"

David Bellamy comments:

"Well what do you expect? These people need education and shown the proper way to live. It's bloody squalor what's caused this. The dirty feckers"

Make Duff's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!


More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 5 multiplied by 1?

9 5 8 7
78 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more