Written by politicalpop
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Wednesday, 21 February 2007

image for Do-Gooders Who Sign Identity Cards Petition Are Beaten Up
Signing a petition is a great way to help the security forces

When the group NO2ID travelled to Downing Street and delivered a petition signed by 18 million people opposed to the introduction of identity cards, they got more than they bargained for. On their return, each of the people who had signed the petition had their doors knocked down at two in the morning, and were beaten up.

Completely blowing out of the water any idea that the government wouldn't use identity cards to snoop on people and take away their liberties, a spokesman for the Home Office said that they were pleased that people came forward with the opportunity to clear their names.

Tony Blair was quick to seize upon the speed with which the security operation moved on this, especially when there were beards involved.

"Ya, you know, it saves me a great deal of time and money if people give me their names and addresses in a list. It's the hallmark of a fair and open society. It makes me very proud, vain, envious and a little lusty."

Adding to his tally of deadly sins, the Operation, codenamed, Shambles, probably went wrong, and was condemned by civil liberties groups up and down the country.

Next week, the Home Secretary, Dr. John Reid, will outline controversial plans for using the BNP to beat up bad people.

A petition has been started opposing this, but The Spoof has learned that so far, there is only one name on it, a Mr. Noel Edmonds, of Crinkly Bottom, Guildford, Surrey, GU2 6GB.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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