"There never was, nor, are, nor ever will be, a future Tory Pot Smoking Leader!" exclaimed shadow Chancellor George "Brownie" Osborne". "I was at Eaton with David "MJ" Cameron and a joint never touched that 15 year old's lips".
Fellow Eaton alumni, Cheech and Chong confirmed Cameron and Osborne's claims: "Those dudes neva smoked the wacky, hombre! (Both notorious Latino potheads asked to go on record protesting TheSpoof.com's unwillingness to supply the Spanish language upsidedown exclamation point for the start of their quote) We knew 'cause we got high with all those chivitos y chivotes. Esmoke usta pour out of those rooms like a four alarm blaze and believe me, mano, we inhaled, not like that gringo Rhodes scholar at Oxford! You know what he wanted someone to smoke! Sheeeet!"
The laughing pair stopped to take a huff off their bongs before resuming the interview. "We will tell you one thing, carnal, those two made the best pot brownies in the prep. Alice B Toklas, my ass! Toke on one of Cameron-Osbourne's maryjanes and you'll have remembrances of things past, present and future that will make Proust's madeleines seem like animal crackers, MIJO!"