Written by Breeze
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Saturday, 10 February 2007

image for Daniel Radcliffe admits bird flu caused by Harry Potter cloning experiment
A chicken with the sniffles yesterday

Daniel Radcliffe has admitted that he is responsible for the H5N bird flu virus which struck Britain this week.

The bespectacled actor revealed that he had been conducting cloning experiments in his garden shed and, in an attempt to create a superhuman avian-human chimera, he inadvertently provided a Trojan horse for the disease to enter our species.

Daniel claims he was coerced into performing the experiments by JK Rowling, author of the popular Harry Potter books, because he was getting too old to play the part and she wanted Radcliffe clones to carry on making the multi-million dollar making movies.

"Rowling knew the movies made millions," a weeping Radcliffe told us today, "She knew another actor playing Harry would damage their appeal."

Amateur scientist, Radcliffe, claimed, "My mistake was to try and make superhuman clones. I crossed my owl's DNA with my own, in order to get bigger eyes and be able to turn my head round 360 degrees, unfortunately viral contaminates hidden inside the bird's mitochondrial cells mutated and the disease was born."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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