London - (Rioters): Police officers probing the Prime Mobster's cash-for-honors scam have admitted they were able to bug the entire Downing Street Administration infrastructure after a covert surveillance operation on President George Bush's controversial warantless wiretap initiative.
This gave them all the dirt on his cosy little set-up that saw IRA gangsters appointed to the monarchy, the aristocracy and the House of Lords. And not forgetting the London catering industry which became the sole preservative of Al-Qaeda overlord affiliates.
In an operation codenamed Bugging Me Bugging You the Met's Fraud Squad was able to track Tony Blair's entire supporting cast of thousands as he and the US President played out their Global Piss Process bravura performance on the world stage to the ecstatic applause of TheoCon sub-species morons hooked on mainlining The Rapture.
This weekend things look grim as the half-time score goes two nil to the cops and Blair's sick-as-a-parrot Gatekeeper Ruth Turner realises her dawn arrest on Friday was planned ever since 9/11.
At his Prime Monsterial retreat at Chequers Blair is said to be confident that Things Can Only Get Bitter as his 1997 landslide election victory paen foretold.
In a secret intelligence installation in cenral London Officer Plod and his trusty chaps are poring over swabs and samples released by the UK's National Poisons Unit which merely confirm findings of the Who's Who of International Asslicking of November 2000.
Meanwhile Comet McNaught continues its relentless transit of Downing Street skies ahead of an impending conjunction with the US Ambassador's Regent's Park residency later this week.
Expect more developments soon.