Written by Duff
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Topics: Money, business

Friday, 19 January 2007

image for Sir Monty: My Spectacular Fall From The High Life
"Spare somfing for a cuppa tea guv'nor" Sir Monty Ponty yesterday

It's tough at the top and if you don't believe it just ask Sir Monty Ponty, for one minute you're flying high and the next you're on you arse.

Monty's tale is a fascinating one outlining the fickleness of man. He told us:

"I was the head of my own multi-million pound corporation. I had my own private jet and a string of houses in the world's trendiest places; in short everything I could ever want.

But one day I went and lost it all for the silliest of reasons. This bloke came up to me in the wine bar and said, 'a word to the wise Monty, Lucky lady in the two thirty at Kempton Park, it can't lose'

Well like a fool I staked everything I had in the world on it and the bloody thing lost and that was me fecked!"

Sir Monty now has to eke out a miserable living under the arches of Vauxhall Bridge, bumming the odd quid off passers by.

It's a sad tale and no mistake but the lesson is surely that if a tipster has a word in your shell-like about a nag that just can't lose, then heed him at your peril. Just remember Sir Monty before you make that trip to the bookies.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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