Written by Ben Macnair
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Topics: Nick Clegg

Sunday, 31 December 2017

image for Nick Clegg says 'You'll address me as Sir, you little gob-shite'
I am sorry, Nick, I mean Sir Nick.

Newly Knighted, former deputy prime Minister Nick Clegg has told his former boss, David (Dave to my mates) Cameron, 'You'll address me as Sir, you little gob-shite'.

The altercation took place in a part of London, where the former colleagues met, buying their favourite polyester slacks and blue polo shirts. After arguing for a while, about which band was the best, Blur or Oasis, both men of the people admitted a fondness for both the Smiths, and Shakin' Stevens, particularly at this time of year, when their songs can be heard on a loop in the shops.

'Yes, I was made a Knight this year' said Mr Clegg, 'so I thought I would make the best of it. Of course, being able to rub Dave's face in it made the award so much better'.

Former British Prime Minister Gordon Brown was heard to say 'I agree with Sir Nick'.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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