Written by Jaggedone
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Sunday, 25 June 2017

image for UK "Nappy Tax" imposed on parents binning nappies!
He never wore a diaper, was clean after a week, talked after a month and hasn't stopped since!

UK stinking rubbish bins containing dirty nappies will now face a "Nappy Tax" and the owners of the nappies, not the babies, will have to pay more for binning their disposable diapers (is that word used in the UK?).

Young parents are up in arms about the latest rises in their cost of living as UK councils provide them with larger bins to accommodate for the loads of babies poop being dumped together with mountains of waste food.

Grandmas are giving young mums some advice in how to reduce the amount of disposable nappies they dump and here are just some of the tips given:

1) Take the f'ing pill!

2) Buy cloth nappies like we used on you!

3) Wash them, recycle them, and you will not only save money, you will reduce your garbage and hence, you will only need a smaller rubbish bin!

4) Don't feed your baby on prepared meals, powder milk and other unnatural products, they make babies fart, crap and pee more and cause an unbearable stench.

5) Feed baby on mum's milk and prepare fresh vegetables because modern babies will not eat so much if they are not fed on modern, ready made, sugar-filled, factory crap!

6) Do not believe in nappy adverts filled with non-smelly, beautiful babies because they are FAKE!

7) Sit baby on potty asap and do not let if get up until it's done the business. (This tip might lead the RSPCC to visit you but, tell them to mind their own f'ing business, and sod off!)

8) Instead of buying nappies, buy a potty and stick it on babies po 24/7!

So there you have it, tips from grannies who know everything better about bringing up baby, saving money, and making life a pain in the butt for young, modern, chic mums who have no time to bring up their kids because they are too busy working to buy nappies for them!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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