Written by XRhonda Speaks
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Topics: marijuana

Wednesday, 17 August 2016

image for South Yorkshire Cops Caught Getting High After Claiming THC Poisoning
Sting has become a proper police oficer and posed for a photo after giving a backyard marijuana grower a warning.

Two South Yorkshire police officers were arrested for possession and use of marijuana and will likely lose their jobs because of it. Ironically the very same two officers were on sick leave for supposed THC poisoning in a marijuana tainted burger case.

The story starts when officers Fred Athalia and Drus Hitt received burgers tainted with marijuana at a McDonalds on Wombat Way.

Officer Athelia first noticed that there was an unusual substance in his Filet-0-fish, then officer Hitt noticed the same in his Quarter Pounder. Employees Steve Martinez and Eddie Haskel were soon arrested for the deed and the officers later checked themselves in to Rotherham Hospital for medical evaluation.

The officers were subject to public ridicule for taking a week of sick leave to recover after the incident.

Long time pot smoker and marijuana activist Lance Palin was vocal in criticizing the officers for putting on a big show of being sick.

"I saw the pictures on the news and there wasn't enough pot on the sandwiches to get a fly high. What those kids did was stupid but as far as actually harming the officers, there would have been little or no effect at all. The crybaby cops even got paid sick leave for hazardous duty that does not count against their regular sick leave."

At the time South Yorkshire Police defended their officers sick leave and promised to bring full charges against the two fast food workers for assault and poisoning.

But that all changed after this weeks events: Yorkshire police in a special crime unit were executing an arrest warrant at a house when they noticed a strong odor of marijuana coming from next door. The special police unit followed the smell to a back yard barbecue where officers Hitt and Athelia were vaporizing "wax" a super-concentrated extract of marijuana.

Most often these days police will give a warning when they catch pot smokers and growers, and in egregious cases even will confiscate an offenders weed. In this instance because the two smokers were recognized as officers, and their claims in the THC Poisoning case were known, they were arrested and relieved of all duties pending further investigation.

Pot proponent Palin says the new information bolsters the claim that the officers were not harmed by the pot in the sandwiches.

"This wax is good stuff and you don't need much, what these officers were inhaling in a single puff is a hundred times more powerful than the stuff our grandparents were smoking, so the officers claims of THC poisoning in the burger case is specious at best."

Fast food workers Martinez and Haskel had a public defender until the latest wrinkle in the case, but now that the powerhouse legal team of Sanders and Cassandro are representing the pair, South Yorkshire Police are on edge.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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