Jaggedone's CIA (cockroach Infiltration Army) special demographic upheaval reporter, Sir Bob Subterranean-Blues-Witherspoon, spent a filthy night under the English Channel observing an Exodus (Bob Marley intro please) of True Brits flooding the Channel Tunnel hoping to escape a Syrian tsunami heading north!
Thousands were seen, women, children, mums and dads, even grannies with zimmerframes, lead by UKIP's entering the tunnel near Folkestone in a desperate attempt to go underground before the shit hits the fan! A French truck driver said "Mon Dieu, merde" as he was forced back by the Exodus and helpless French customs officers stood amazed as a plethora of Union Jack clad Brits stopped the trains as they run for the beaches of Dunkirk and others!
Our star CIA reporter stopped one desperate family, whose father wore a pink turban, turned up moustache and rather baggy trousers and asked why the hell he was fleeing the land of "Hope and Glory" and where were they heading! Here his answer:
"Sir, sure, before this tsunami hits our beautiful homeland, we have decided it is much better to quit before it sinks so we are going to set up an Indian restaurant in Gibralter the last bastion of real Great Britain run by the Spanish!"
Luckily, the French customs acted like they usually do, 'tres relax et vous" and thousands of ethnic Brits are now heading south towards the Rock where monkeys will never leave and true Brits can really feel safe.
However, local habitants living on the rock, Barbary Macaques, have decided to follow Hungarian politics by building a 6 meter high electric fence around the rock to keep the imperialist bastards out!
Morocco though will accept any Brits not allowed on to the rock in exchange for Africans heading in the opposite direction as long as they bring their Range Rovers with them!