Written by Jools M
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Topics: Russia, Poison

Friday, 1 December 2006

image for Russian Ambassador Grows Second Head
Exclusive: X-Ray images of the Russian Ambassador's extra head

The Russian ambassador to the UK, Anatoly Buggarrov was admitted to hospital yesterday after he began to develop a second head.

Doctors treating the Russian diplomat said that his condition was stable and he remained in isolation while tests were carried out to determine the source of the problem.

Professor Tarquin Ramsay of the neurological department at the hospital described Mr. Buggarrov's condition as stable and although in isolation he was "able to keep himself entertained as he now no longer needed anyone else to hold an intelligent conversation. "

The source of the growth remains something of a mystery and Police forensic teams are carrying out extensive tests at the sushi bar where Buggarov met Sergei Crotchitch an enriched Ukrainian arms dealer for lunch last Wednesday.

A Kremlin spokesman was quoted as saying "The incident with the Gherkin and Mrs. Putin was regrettable and Mr. Bugarrov apologised to the president in person" he added "We would usually only look to use poisoning in extreme circumstances"

Bugarrov fell out of favour with the Kremlin last year when at a dinner he made a pass at Vladymir Putin's wife during a state banquet and was caught urinating on the Stalin memorial.

Bugarrov will be appearing on the Johnathan Ross show this friday.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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