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Thursday, 30 November 2006

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Tebbit to Cameron - 'On yer bike!'

The former Chingford skinhead, Norman Tebbit, now Baron Tebbit, is believed to be plotting to oust David Cameron from the leadership of the Tory Party.

The firebrand bonkers 'get on yer bike' proponent is said to be taking 'soundings from colleagues' to see whether he can 'garner sufficient backing' to mount his challenge. If he gets enough support he will 'throw his hat into the ring' and may well also 'let his name go forward'

He is currently not an MP but a source close to the Bonkers Baron intimated that "it wouldn't be a problem we'll have a word with some safe-seat backbencher. Knowhadahmean?"

In an exclusive interview the no-nonsense hard man and Maggie Thatcher's favourite told The Spoof:

"David (Cameron) is a big softy and doesn't have the balls to take on Blair. We need to draft a new manifesto to include: The re-introduction of the death penalty for theft of library books, sending all Eastern Europeans back to France, the annexation of France by Britain and the rounding up of all those on any kind of state benefit and flogging them on an hourly basis"

Tony Blair has said that he will suggest Gordon Brown watches how the Conservatives do and if Tebbit is successful then pick the best bits and claim them for Labour.

"Don't change a winning formula" smiled the smug PM

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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