Written by Stevey G.
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Topics: Dogs, Poo

Friday, 1 May 2015

image for Dudley Council to clamp down on irresponsible dog-owners
Warning signs already erected in Dudley parks

Residents of Dudley, in the West Midlands, have become so enraged with irresponsible dog owners who allow their pets to foul in public places and then fail to clear up their mess, that they have demanded that the local council take drastic action.

The proposal, which is to be voted on at the next council meeting, is that persons found guilty of such a crime in the future will have both of their legs chopped off at the knee.

Local Councillor, Mr A Mahmoud, 41, stated that he would be voting in favour of the motion.

'I know that this sounds harsh.' he stated earlier today, 'Yet I am very much in favour of this proposal.'

' For too long, irresponsible dog owners have allowed their pets to foul in public and do not clean up after them. Threats of prosecution or fines are rarely applied and if so remain unpaid as many of the offenders are claiming benefits in any case.'

Local resident and dog owner Doris Wimple, 57, was less keen.

'I consider myself a responsible dog-owner and always clean up after my dog.' she said to our reporter. She agreed however that many were not as conscientious.

'I suppose that this would act as an ultimate deterrent,' she conceded.

'After all, if they have their legs chopped off, then the owners will not be able to take their dogs on a walk and so the animals will be forced to shit on their owner's premises.'

It's just common-sense.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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