Written by Stevey G.
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Topics: Earthquake, Nepal

Monday, 27 April 2015

image for UK Search and Rescue Team fail to locate Nepal
'Excuse me, can you tell me the way to Nepal please?'

24 hours after their departure, the UK's premier search and rescue organisation, The Hampstead Heath Search and Rescue Sunday Club, have been forced to return home after failing to locate Nepal.

Upon learning of the catastrophic earthquake in Nepal and the reported loss of over 3000 lives, the search and rescue specialists launched into action in the hope of being amongst the first volunteers to arrive on the scene.

Team leader, Sathe-Navinder (Sat-Nav) Singh, 46, from Highgate insists that the operation was jinxed from the start.

'The operation was jinxed from the start,' he reported at a press conference earlier today. 'We were desperate to set off quickly but Bill couldn't find his shovel. Arthur wouldn't leave without his lucky underpants, which were in the wash and the map that we had in the van only went as far as Watford.'

Despite this the team left in high spirits.

'We had every hope of getting there,' continued Mr.Singh. 'After Watford we stopped several times to ask people if they knew the whereabouts of Nepal but no one had a clue. In the end we were forced to return home as we were running out of petrol and I'd forgotten my Nectar card.'

Mr.Singh seemed a little embarrassed about the entire episode.

'I admit that this looks bad, but I'm sure that we'll all be laughing about it this time tomorrow. After all, how many people actually know
where Nepal is?'

The Spoof.com decided to take up Mr.Singh's challenge and find out.

Despite the UK's generous offer to donate £5 million towards the disaster fund, 95% of MP's were unable to accurately locate the position of Nepal on a map of the world.

The general public fared no better, with only 3 people out of the hundred polled being able to accurately state the whereabouts of Nepal. Whilst many were able to get fairly close, some of the more bizarre attempts put the location of Nepal as being somewhere on the Isle of Wight (apparent mix-up with Newport)and one person who thought Nepal was a town just outside Luton.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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