Written by LEDHEAD
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Topics: Sex scandal

Monday, 6 April 2015

image for BBC tea lady Mavis Mullen arrested over allegations of historical sex offences dating back to the 1970s
Mavis Mullin slightly awake during Police interrogation.

Yet another arrest at the BBC yesterday as trolley lady, Mavis Mullen, was named publicly on Twitter for historical sex offences dating back to the 1970's. Mavis, now 89, had plagued the corridors and offices at the BBC targeting young men while dispensing tea and scones.

Clive Thomas was the whistle blower and the one who had recently posted very explicit descriptions of the sexual misconduct Mrs Mullen was involved in. She often did her daily tea trip topless and would make inappropriate comments to the lads about her being pinned down on a desk and given a good seeing to. Quite often she would rub her tea cakes against her breasts and roll her tongue about provocatively. Mr Thomas claims to have been tied naked to an office chair by the perpetrator and clotted cream rubbed in 'his bits'. He is still being treated for post traumatic stress to this very day and has been self medicating on a bottle of vodka every night since.

Bosses at the BBC say the 648 cases of historical sexual misconduct by ex members of staff is a travesty and they now feel their organisation is being persecuted. Most people remember tea lady Mrs Mullen as a happy go lucky person who was slightly eccentric and a lover of the Carry On Films.

Scotland Yard say questioning of Mrs Mullen is taking forever as she is very deaf now and has a tendency to nod off without warning.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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