Written by Ella Davide
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Sunday, 5 April 2015

Messrs Cameron, Osborne , Miliband et al are cashing in on the time of Year, to gain votes.

Mr Camron is quoted saying, that , the Tories will ''rise again'', though associates say this may be a reaction to his wife's prolonged absence and possible liaison with an extra on 'Poldark', whom she encountered, in a Taunton Post Office queue.

George Osborne's PR guys are presenting him as the Tax Collector of Tomorrow.

Mileeband's team are working on a 20 second ad, in which he washes the feet of Manchester's homeless men, but we understand Health and Safety Laws dictate that the feet 'are required to be clean and non - clawed, or possessing of Hammer Toes'.

Mr Farage is to appear as a genial Easter Bunny at Thanet Town Centre, though locals Lib Dem voters threaten to 'CRUCIFY HIM' in the Polls.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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