Written by LEDHEAD
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Thursday, 12 March 2015

image for Edinburgh Trams to be leased out as Bars and Night Clubs

District councilors are still scratching their heads why the city's 21st Century tram system finally ended up costing 776 million pounds. A brain storming session at the city chambers which included Edinburgh' s top accountants ended with no firm reason but an astonishing admission that there had been difficult language barriers with the German contractor.

Servicing the interest on the tram's loans was a top priority for the Council and a questionnaire was sent out to each and every rates payer asking them to submit ideas on - 'How to make more money from the trams?'.

The council have been flooded with suggestions from the public, not all of them helpful, but enough to bolster extra money to pay for the one line network.

The best idea came from a James MacHaulage, a catering consultant from Morningside, who came up with the concept of renting out the trams after midnight to local bars and restaurant owners.

The ability to serve drinks and food on these moving mobile entertainment units and possibly a night club or two would easily bring in extra dosh to alleviate the over burdened rates payer.

It was also suggested that during the festival that the trams could be rented out as venues for theatre groups or comedy stores.

There are issues to be considered such as whether the trams should be static or moving , toilet arrangements and tariff costing. These issues were not seen as a major hurdle by eminent Council members mind you.

Ideas that were rejected by the Council include massage areas, gyms, pool halls, guided tours, swimming baths, shops, council administration offices, hotels and even an off the wall proposal to hike up the tram ticket to a cost of fifty pounds.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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