Written by Duff
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Topics: ASBO

Tuesday, 28 November 2006

image for Unborn Child Served With ASBO
What you looking at? You want a fight or summink?!

In what's believed to be the first incident of its kind we can report that an unborn foetus has been served with an ASBO. Belfryshire Council has today applied to Magistrates to sanction the extraordinary move.

The unborn sprog, to be named Wayne if it's a boy and Febreze if it's a girl, was served the order today at the belfryshire antenatal clinic. The nipper is said to be the product of a union between two habitual thugs and according to Detective Inspector Wright-Bastard of the Belfryshire force:

"It's going to be a right piece of work, mark my words. We reckon the trouble will probably start at nursery where it will inevitably bash up all the other little kiddies there, and this will continue through junior and senior schools when of course it is sure to be expelled.

It will then hang around the shops and terrorise the local community forming a gang of thugs who regularly prey on innocent pensioners"

Social worker Persephone Lloyd-Williams told The Spoof:

"We know that this is an unusual step but it's hoped that the move will at least do something to nip the problem in the bud"

Neither of the child's future parents was available for comment last night as they were out hanging around the shops terrorising people and preying on innocent pensioners.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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