Written by Auntie Jean
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Topics: Jesus, Names, Chinese

Friday, 16 January 2015

image for 2,000 Injured In Bradford Stampede As Taxi Driver Shouts "Taxi for Abu"
Crowds yesterday in Bradford

A "rookie" taxi driver, who pulled up in the centre of Bradford last night at 11.30 and shouted, "Is there an Abu here?" has been suspended after 2,000 Abus were taken to Bradford Hospital A&E unit with crush injuries.

First names, traditionally used to distinguish one individual from another are becoming less effective in Bradford as everyone has the same one.

Radio appeals to stop parents from calling children Abu or Ali have been repeatedly ignored. Additionally, in the Spanish sector of Bradford, the number of Jesus, Marys and Josephs has continued to rise exponentially.

In Bradford's China-town district, taxi drivers are forbidden to shout the first name, "Zhang" for health and safety reasons. Almost every male and female in the area are called "the greatest" or Zhang . . .

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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