Written by OTlens
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Thursday, 13 November 2014

UKIP, right wing Tories and red-top tabloids have all today condemned the entrance of an illegal immigrant into Paddington. The suspect believed to be named as Paddington Bear was taken in my a suburban family believed to be known as 'The Browns' and has led to their social ostracized from Windsor Gardens.

A spokesman for the family said "We are guardian reading lefties who hold guardian reading leftish views. Paddington should stay with us for the foreseeable future and he needs our help and he will get it."

The decision by the Browns has provoked fury from across the daily mail reading British public. Nigel Farage has been quoted as saying "See this is proof. Until we leave the EU we will be unable to send back criminals and bears from claiming benefits and taking the opportunities away from young British boys and girls." When put to Farage that Paddington Bear is actually from Peru "Well it does not actually matter the EU are wrong anyway.....now wheres that half ale."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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