Written by queen mudder

Print this

Monday, 20 November 2006

image for Poisoned spook: net closes in on Abramovich
So overloaded with coke, it could only submerge 2ft

London - (AssoCIAted Mess): Police investigating the suspicious poisoning of a former KGB officer Alexander Litvinenko are reported to be bugging cash-strapped Russian oligarch and Chelsea football club owner Roman Abramovich after claims that 'someone snitched-up' a Colombian submarine that was seized off Costa Rica today with three tonnes of cocaine on board.

The Type 1 U-boat was enroute to London's Chelsea Harbour but was so overloaded with cargo that it could only submerge to a depth of two feet - a record by normal standards for this class of vessel but hardly appropriate for large-scale narcotics trafficking.

This may have proved a bit of a give-away as coast-guards pounced on the hapless craft which was sporting the traditional sky-blue livery of the famous West London soccer team.

It was intercepted just outside the Coca Islands, south-west of the mainland.

Meanwhile at the UK National Poisons Unit Accident and Emergency clinic Litvinenko is said to be in a serious condition with a confirmed case of vallium poisoning.

And British press sources have been described as having a field day with scare stories smearing Vlad 'The Impaler' Putin with the blame for this dastardly deed, claiming that the toxin used was a rare subsstance called 'thallium'....


More news expected tomorrow.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 multiplied by 3?

4 15 2 12
65 readers are online right now!

Go to top