Australia has given way to "whingeing Poms" by agreeing to celebrate Guy Fawkes night. The tribal chiefs have said though that like Easter no one will know when it is.
"There is no point in lighting extra bonfires though, as our cities catch fire every summer." Said a spokesperson yesterday.
The first huge Bush fire will signal the burning of Guy Fawkes effigies and the toasting of Jumbucks, toffee etc. Australia has had fireworks for some years now so there will be plenty going on.
"We will probably get Rolf Harris or Dame Edna to switch on the fire hoses." said the spokesperson.