Written by Talking Tic-Tacs
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Friday, 29 November 2013

image for Bozo Bojo in Faux-Pas No-No
How much Boris? No it isn't £3.50 Boris

Boris Johnson's laissez faire approach to inequality and links to intelligence levels have been applauded by a group representing council estate dwellers who are keen to implement his theory in every sphere of life.

The Mayor of London gave a speech yesterday in which he remarked that some people, stupid people, will always be left behind due to natural IQ levels, and that really bright people always get ahead in life.

Critics point out that his selective theory seems to be ignoring the nurture side of the debate which sees people like himself exposed to privileged education, high brow culture and lobster from early life, as opposed to Countdown, Jeremy Kyle and Pot Noodles.

Gary from the Working Class Alliance somewhat agreed with Johnson, "What he's basically saying is that life is survival of the fittest but in intelligence terms. Fair enough, so how about we apply ACTUAL survival of the fittest where physical capability becomes important too? I mean sure I wouldn't beat him in a Latin test or Political History exam but i'm pretty sure I could beat him at running, beat him at throwing, beat him at joinery, beat him, yeah just beat him, i'm sure. With pleasure."

Gary's call for effectively returning to a barbaric society where physical dominance rules had Bojo's feathers ruffled as he envisaged a world where he was most definitely at the root of the foot of the hierarchy.

Johnson remarked "Ah old son intellect always wins out over physicality".

To which Gary replied "Not if it's just intellect and physicality in one room".

The Mayor has been difficult to track down since.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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