Written by Backandtotheleft
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Monday, 14 October 2013

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If You Have Complained To OFCOM This Is Smarter Than You

Back and to the Left News has discovered a new sociology test that has been running on the British public over the last five years. The test, run in conjunction with Ofcom has come to the conclusion that anyone who watches a TV show and then complains to Ofcom about that TV show is too stupid to own a TV.

A spokesman defended the secret tests:

"There has been a substantial rise in the number of idiot's ringing up to complain about what's happening on their magic glowing boxes. The final straw which made us publicise our findings was the out-cry over the rape scene in Downton Abby. Clearly people are unable to separate "real" from "fiction" we can only deduce that the people who complained are suffering from delusions that inhibit their perception of reality. Surely every effort to reduce their stress must be made."

In response to Ofcom's findings, the government has said that they intend to confiscate the TV of anyone deemed too stupid to operate one. A government guy (with a suit on and everything) said:

"If people are too confused to turn off a TV when they don't like something, we won't give them the option of turning one on in the first place. We've had enough of people writing to ministers telling us that Lady Gaga wasn't wearing enough clothes on the X-Factor. I don't give a fuck, I've got an economy to patch up."

He confided in us that even though politicians couldn't give a shit what happens on TV. They were forced to by a whinging public convinced that it held some sort of moral superiority because it can operate a Twitter account.

Back and to the Left news understands if people were making complaints about what was on the TV, the quality of the programming and suchlike. But to complain about the lack of clothes a pop star is wearing on a program that creates marketable human beings that can be then whored out to the public, until external pressures cause their mediocre talents to implode like a dying star a little bit hypocritical.

Remember, instead of complaining to Ofcom about the terrible things your seeing and how Britain's got Talent is corrupting your children, why don't you try raising your kids rather than the flickering box.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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