Another day another punning newspaper headline about shale gas extraction. The industry has been a godsend for copywriters everywhere. Said one fleet street hack, "the great thing about Fracking is that it's possible to replace the word 'fuck', with the word 'Frack' for comic effect. Obviously, if we could think of a way making something like wind power funny we would, but sadly, there's nothing amusing about inappropriate wind."
Many environmental pressure groups have already got in on the act. Most people are familiar with bandwagon jumpers "Frack Off" but lately a number of new pressure groups have joined the scene. One such group is, "Frack Me Where the Sun Don't Shine", who describe themselves as a pro-fracking anti-solar power group. Roderick Smythley Wittington founder of FMWSDS, is highly critical of solar power - "When I was a lad we used to have these solar power calculators and digital watches - They were rubbish! Do we really want our energy needs to be reliant on solar powered calculators. I think not! We at Frack Me where the Sun Don't Shine say, Frack me Silly! We love Fracking and we like to Frack!'"
In response to public concerns about the dangers of Fracking, the government have set up a new industry watchdog. OffFrack will be responsible for regulating the shale gas extraction industry. Said a spokesdrone for the Department of the Environment, "We just couldn't miss out on an opportunity to set up an industry watchdog, which sounds a lot like the insult, 'Fuck Off', except with the words swapped around. I mean why should the hacks and the environmentalists have all the fun?"