Written by IainB
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Thursday, 15 August 2013

image for Stella McCartney unveils the Sochi Winter Olympic range
The bob sled team are less than impressed.

Stella McCartney has unveiled her new range of winter Olympic clothing for the British athletes taking part in Sochi, and it has sent shock waves through the international community.

For the women, all the designs are based around dungarees, whilst skirts are incorporated into all the male outfits, along with very tight skimpy vests.

"We're sending a message to the anti-LGBT laws recently passed in Russia," said the clothing designing daughter of former Beatles guitarist, Paul McCartney.

The predominant colour scheme of the new uniforms incorporates both the red, white and blue of the Union Jack, and also the rainbow of the LGBT flag.

"We think that this new range will provide out athletes with a great range of freedom for their individual sports," said Stella. "Additionally, it will highlight Britain's stance on equality, diversity and support of oppressed minorities."

David Cameron has approved the new designs personally, saying it is the least Britain can do to show their opposition to repression and denigration of homosexuals and transgendered people in Russia. After his recent open letter, Stephen Fry has tacitly agreed that the new outfits will send a message, but at the moment he's unsure what it is.

"If we're not going to boycott," Fry was overheard saying in a pub on Watling Road, "then sending a solidarity message to the new Tsar of Russia is the next best thing."

The athletes themselves are less than pleased, with the bob sled team announcing that the feathered headdresses could slow them down.

Due to a lack of Russian speaking Spoof journalists, Vladimir Putin was unavailable for comment.

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