Written by Darwin
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Friday, 19 July 2013

image for Text Message Leads To Tragedy
"Ed enjoyed his meal"

Mark Cooper, a 21-year-old university student from Oldham, Greater Manchester, has died after misinterpreting a text from his mother. Mark was out jogging when his mum, Susan, sent him the following message:

The neighbour's pet, Ed, wants to have a sleep in your bedroom. Is it okay if let him in?

Apparently believing that Susan was referring to their neighbour's cat, Ed, who visited regularly to sleep on Mark's bed, he replied to let him in. But tragically, Susan was referring to the pet of another neighbour, whose 25-foot alligator - coincidentally also named Ed - was looking for somewhere to have an afternoon nap.

Mark returned from his jogging session to find the eight ton reptile resting on his bed - and became its afternoon meal.

Ed's owner, Alan Green, says, "It's a bit sad, but these things happen. People need to realise that animals can be dangerous. Ed enjoyed his meal though, and I'm happy to have saved money on alligator food."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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