London - (AssoCIAted Mess): Classified records released under the UK's 9/11 Freedom of Disinformation Act have revealed the shockingh truth behind Chancellor Gordon Brown's true parentage and name the Earl of Mountbatten's daughter Patricia as his birth mother following a passionate but ultimately disastrous dalliance with former KGB officer and subsequent UK Labour Prime Monster Harold Wilson RIP.
And recently published photographs of Patricia Edwina Victoria Knatchbull, 2nd Countess Mountbatten of Burma, show just what a startling physical resemblance she has to her bastard offspring whose parentage has been kept a secret for the last fifty years following a dodgy deal done by the Mountbatten family, the UK Labour Party and UK shareholders of the Riggs Bank who financed the young Brown's career path into its present Hellfire Club flagship position.
The rumpus comes hot on the heels of Brown's keynote address to the Labour party conference in Manchester today where a slanging match erupted when Cherie Blair rubbished the Chancellor's
chances of succeeding her husband as the UK's number one organised crime chief and P2 Lodge successor to Margaret Thatcher's tenure of the top gangster job within the European Union.
Lady Mountbatten has refused to comment on the allegations contained in the newly released security files. However, hacks pursuing the story have managed to ascertain from the UK's National Poisons Unit that conclusive DNA tests on her, on WIlson and on the alleged offspring Brown proved positive as far back as 22 November 1963, the day that US President John F Kennedy was assasinated in Dallas, Texas following a contractual agreement between the House of Mountbatten's Elizabeth Windsor and George Herbert Bush, subsequently 41st US president.
The news comes as no surprise to archivists of the UK's Hellfire Club and its American sister organization the Ancient American Order of the Skull 'N' Bones, of which seven generations of the Bush family have been founding members and without whose support the Riggs Bank would have gone down the proverbial pan a long, long time ago.
Lady Mountbatten's lawyers are staying as tight lipped as their client today while feverish speculation mounts in the UK amid rumors that bent spooks within the British security and intelligence services were paid by the Vatican Bank to carry out a lengthy policy of concealment of this Mountbatten/Wilson lineage in order to protect the KGB's own flagship carrier the P2 Lodge.
Tomorrow's Labour Party Conference in Manchester will see the Prime Minister Tony Blair's grand finale address of the Party faithful.
UK bookmakers are tipping odds of 3/1 FAV that the Mountbatten bloodline fiasco will break sometime in the afternoon after the keynote speech.
General Pinochet is 91.