The House of Commons was rocked to its democratic foundations, today, when the war-loving British Prime Minister announced that George W Bush would replace him when he retires on May 6th 2007.
It had been thought that Gordon, Brown the Scottish Chancellor of the Exchequer was the favourite choice to take over when the disgraced ‘Butcher of Iraq' is thrown out of office. But now it appears that a deal was struck between the two ‘presidents' whereby Blair would take over the White House and DUBYA would take charge of the ‘Limey colony'. Constitutionalists have raised doubts that this was unconstitutional and therefore illegal like his war on Iraq.
Blair immediately countered this argument by asserting that he believed that the American government had built up a stockpile of weapons of mass destruction and avowed that he would find them and arrest the evil American scientists who had built them. It has long been a sore point with Tony Blair that no weapons of mass destruction were found in Iraq and it is thought that ‘Butcher' Blair's confidence would be restored if he could find any thermo-nuclear weaponry in the States. Old movies have shown that America has possessed nuclear weapons in the past as witnessed by the use of these terror weapons in the country now known as Japan. It seems very likely that mister Blair will indeed find weapons of mass destruction in America.
America's 43rd President was delighted to have found employment, due to his imminent departure from the White House at the end of his term in office. Insiders have become increasingly concerned at the parlous state of the President's finances due to rumours that his wife, Barbara, was taking in laundry to supplement the family's income. Reliable sources have also reported of claims that the President has been spotted moonlighting as a yellow cab driver in downtown Manhattan. This behaviour pattern is reminiscent of that observed during the latter parts of Bill Clinton's term of presidency. Billy's lack of cash resulted in the disgraced sex machine having to bum his way round the world, eking out a meagre living by making after dinner speeches.
Cherie Blair, who rose to the top of the British legal profession in spite of her humble beginnings in the slums of Liverpool, was delighted at the prospect of being the ‘First Lady,' She intimated that she would bring the White House back into the twenty first century by making radical changes, in a similar way that she had ‘trashed' number ten Downing Street. Concerns were raised, however when she was overheard in the Oval Office ordering 500 gallons of pink paint to brighten up the Presidents Pad - or ‘Pink House' as she referred to it.
At a celebrity studded party hosted by the Blair's, the two dictators told the guests that the British and American people should be grateful that they live in a democracy where peace and compassion exist side by side.
When Sir Elton and the famous sixties rock guitarist Eric Clapton spontaneously broke into jam-session which include ‘God save America' and ‘Greensleeves,' the old English Ballad allegedly composed by that other famous butcher king Henry vee- eye- eye- eye, there was not a dry eye in the house.
Democracy is truly amazing they all agreed, when its in the safe hand of tyrants.