Written by Joe Leff
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Thursday, 9 May 2013

With unemployment among the working classes reaching record levels, a similar problem could well permeate the upper classes.

Increasing numbers of 'toffs' are worrying about 'joblessness' (which is a 'posh' word for 'unemployment'). And hundreds of JSGs (Joblessness Support Groups) are emerging all over the country.

Lots of other people are also being seriously affected by 'joblessness', since many of them cannot pronounce or spell the word 'joblessness' properly. Plans for counselling advice centres for people who cannot pronounce or spell 'joblessness' are being proposed in many towns and cities. These will be known as Special Help Centres for Mispronunciation and Mis-spelling of Joblessness (SHCMMJ).
New attendees will be advised to refrain from drinking alcohol, as this also interferes with the pronunciation of words with pairs of 'double-ss'.

Parliament will consider these new proposals as soon as a Government minister is able to correctly articulate the specifications.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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